back and forth

and no i'm not talking about the hit from Aaliyah. i'm talking about people who know the truth but choose to play the role as though they don't. i was talking earlier with a friendgirl of mine who happens to be reconciling with a recent love. she called me to discuss a convo she'd had with the guy's ex earlier this morning.
she woke up and texted him that she's headed out for work and would call him later. that move prompted a somewhat expected call. the girl on the other end of the phone was his ex trying to convince my girl that nothing happened and he just came over when he left the club to paint. i blurted out "trick please! he came over to paint? at 3 am in the morning? the only walls he's painting at that hour are pussy walls!" my girl started cracking up. i was so serious. it's like come on now. who are you trying to convince? why keep going back and forth with the man? especially after admitting you don't want him. that's just SELFISH, hoe!! getalife.com

torn

giving people the benefit of the doubt. is that a good or bad thing? i know it's not right to hold past transgressions against someone new, but it's hard when you find someone new and they turn out to be just like who you walked away from. so i figured i would shut out love all together after Mr but of course i meet someone who is cooler than the other side of the pillow. so do i stick to my guns and keep this wall around my heart or do i let this person in? for now i'm gonna stick with the wall until i have more homework done regarding this individual. for the record, he's softening me up. that's always a good thing, or is it?

oh yeah! let me drop everything i'm doing, put on my neglectful mama hat, and go with you...NOT!!!

is it just me or do people without children completely shut out the fact that their associates have children? then again, maybe you are just used to dealing with neglectful whores who don't put their children first. well let me set the record straight for you. I AM A MOTHER!! NOT A BABY MAMA OR A MOMMA! i put my children before me so i am not about to leave them with just anybody because you want to hang out. i went thru too much bringing them into the world so they are my pride and joy. yes, they get on my last nerve sometimes but that's what they're supposed to do. my question to you is why would you want to hang with someone who says they are a mother and does that? my guess is you've never encountered a real MOTHER so you don't know the "code" that we live and in my case, die by. this is sad in a way because thís is what we have to look forward to future generations being taught. actually. it's more like sickening. ok. i'm done ranting...for now!

july is not my month

i'm having the worst start to my month that you can ever think of. so far i've disassociated myself with someone i thought would be cool to hang out with, locked a friends car up for dang near two days, broken my phone (i think it was defective to begin with) and last but not least, i've managed to lose a lump sum of money. not going to say how i lost it. let's just say a poor investment. yeah. we'll stick with that story. this way i don't feel bad at all. all this and i didn't even bring up the fact we had to celebrate my Mother's 53rd birthday without her. so here i sit not even mid-month thinking i need to just get away. i mean get away from it all. i contemplated sending my boys to their Father but quickly changed my mind when he didn't show up after pouring out his heart to divulge his innermost feelings regarding me and the boys. we seem to have this soap opera going on. he professes undying love for me and i tell him it's not fair of him to do that. he asks what? i tell him i'm cool as is. HELP US!!!