a title? really?

she's here B.K.S. and fortunately she arrived a week earlier than expected. 23 March 2011 and i am ok with that. hell i have no choice. that's all i am going to say about that one.
i've been off work for five weeks now and i'm still not excited to go back. i got my UPS package regarding the new shift selection and it all seems like pure dee bullshit at this point. some days i have the urge to go back (usually when my kids are closing in on me) and there are days when i think of going back and my body just doesn't want to cooperate. i usually ask the air "why are you not being a team player?" and go right back to sleep. then there are days when i am like the energizer bunny and can't stop cleaning. but hopefully i'll go back within the next few weeks.
i was able to get out of the house a few times during this stay-cation. i went to a janet jackson concert and this weekend i'm going to see kevin hart. i was talking to a dear friend of mine and he said "for you to be a homebody, you sure go out a lot. front row seats to alicia keys, janet jackson, kevin hart. now a cruise. what's that all about?" i just figured i would enjoy myself as much as possible before i decide to put a label on myself and get into a relationship. and i doubt that will be anytime in the near future. i'm having too good of a time.
i get to go back to atlanta with one of my friend girls at the end of april because my previous trip wasn't all that fun due to it being last minute. i'm supposed to go to vegas to finally meet the wife and sons of one of my oldest and dearest friends. think i'm gonna do that in november or late october so that i can take my twin along and show her a good time for her birthday.
so i'm sitting up in the middle of the night multi-tasking (writing, tweeting, texting, talking, messaging on da book) and i'm at a loss for words so i ask the future Mr. and he doesn't have anything to contribute. i decide to tell him that i'm going to talk about him in my blog. so that was me talking about you in my blog. hope you enjoyed the shout out.
while we're on the subject of me writing, everyone give me a round of applause for getting my act together and getting this book under way. how you like them green apples? momma's on a roll and she's lovin it. i was a little distracted and hit a major "writer's block" for a while but i had some motivation from two awesome freakin individuals. so thank you both.
i really wanteed to make this entry all about BKS but i will save that for another day. in the mean time between time, i'm gonna get my hindquarters in the bed and stare at the ceiling until i fall asleep.

caution: heavily medicated for your protection

being sick is the "pits" and yesterday was one of those days i was forced to take the pain meds that my doctor prescribed. the thing is they do nothing for the pain, and in most instances, makes my brain go into hyper-drive until i fall asleep. well yesterday after taking my meds, i apparently got calls and texts from numerous people and i didn't remember any of them until i was going thru my missed alerts, which included texts from people i don't speak to on a regular basis. seeing this made me want to check my log of all of my interactions and there were of course calls from people that i speak to on the regular (just don't know what i said). the text messages i sent are what bothered me more than anything. i did everything from tell someone i miss them to telling someone else that i despise them and then there's confessing undying love to someone else. i felt like pouring all of the pills down the toilet after reading the madness. i am still trying to figure out how to go about "saving face." any ideas?

do i really need a title?

since i have been up for nearly an hour, i figured i would clear my head. i have been wondering why i am going thru this needy stage for the past month or so and i came to the conclusion that i am out of my mind. i wouldn't say "out" of it so much as not using it to its full potential. i haven't been feeling all that great as far as my kidney goes and everytime i get really sick, i start to turn into a thinking box. don't ask my why because when i am sick, i just lose all sense of creativity and don't feel like using my brain at all. so i'm sitting here wondering why i am up at these stupid hours every night when it hits me that a) the hour isn't stupid because somewhere, someone is doing something productive and 2) this is the time that i should be clearing my head. plus this is when i wake to find two extra bodies in my bed and what better time to make sure everyone is comfortable than an hour before i'm scheduled to wake up for the workit job. gives me time to stare at the ceiling and make plans.